My first nanny job was great, I enjoyed many aspects of it,
but then there were a few that could have brought me undone.
I not only had care of the two young children, my duties
included housekeeping and shopping. Basically, if I didn't do it,
it didn't get done. Cleaning out the pantry and oven to cleaning
the cobwebs in the conservatory. In addition to helping with
Ballet concerts, chasing relatives for visits and all the other
small details that slowly wore me down.
Just as I was starting to feel like a robot - I met another nanny.
She cared for two children of a similar age to mine and they
were friends through preschool. She asked me over for a
play-day - it was my salvation.
I learnt alot from Amanda, she was a professional nanny.
We started our own nanny playgroup by placing ads on the
local noticeboards and in Sydney's Child. It was very informal.
Our playgroup ran on a weekday morning and we would arrange
the location of the next playgroup as we were packing up.
We would meet at each others houses, parks, on the odd occasion
we would arrange to go somewhere special - zoo, museums etc.
On average we had up to ten nannies, the participants changed
as nannies would leave jobs, children would change routines and
move location. Our mornings began with a quick download about
what was bugging us that week, within ten minutes, it was out of
our system and we got down to the practicalities of playgroup.
A few would stay behind to help nut out any particular problems.
The support and guidance we received from the experienced
nannies was wonderful.
We would take turns arranging a craft activity, someone would
read a story, baking would be going on or sometimes we cranked
up the stereo and danced!
As their positions were very demanding, some nannies would
need to just crash on the lounge for an hour. We had one nanny
who we would help out of her car - she had gigantic two-year-old triplets,
whose parents worked in the overseas airline industry.
She would often go days without a break caring for the boys.
Playgroup was her only support.
We'd discuss problems while the children played, the more
experienced nannies would offer some practical strategies and
we'd hear the results the following week. Usually positive.
I loved playgroup and found it the glue which kept me together
for 2 1/2 years in a very demanding position. Later I found myself
in another position where Mum didn't want me to have anything to
do with other nannies or use a car. I found the position very limiting,
her philosophy was having a negative effect on her child.
I negotiated a playgroup morning at the local library, but the child
screamed when she saw the other children and continued to scream
(and I mean scream in terror) if she was with any other children.
It took five weeks, but she then settled. In the meantime - it was horrible.
We started by sitting back in the crowd and if she showed
signs of whimpering, we'd walk around the library,
I don't know what other people thought.
Three months later she would ask every morning - we go goop?!
My only reprieve through this period was a walk around the
neighbourhood, talking to the neighbours cats! Other than that,
we were on our own.
I established a strict routine and would take my favourite CD's along.
Any shows with other children playing in them became our regular
viewing, I think ultimately - this child had not spent any time with
other kids. We'd dance when I'd get fidgety, bake up a storm,
read stories - I found even imaginative play was confronting and
new for her! I later met the previous nanny who said because she
couldn't go anywhere, she watched three hours of soap operas
during the day for adult company.
Life as a nanny can be very quiet, unless you take steps to create
your own support network. It is up to you, if you choose to work
as a professional nanny. Parents will not and cannot hold your
hand through the week. They have employed you to care for their
children and their homes. Find like minded nannies who have
similar aged children, routines and expectation.
You also need to create your own routines and habits, which will
see you through the hard times of nannying. Ironing when your
favourite show/movie is on (and the kids asleep); freeing up time
just before you pick up older children from preschool is imperative
to ensure you are recharged and ready for the next cycle.
Meditation, a session of gentle stretching, yoga or pilates, even
get out the eye toy and use the exercise game. A nice meal, a
brisk walk with bubs, you know your own body and mind - take
care of them. Do something for yourself in the middle of the day
for ten to twenty minutes, or just before you know you're about
to hit your low point.
Depression and isolation has been a problem expressed by some
nannies. These are serious issues which need to be addressed.
If you are not sure what you can do, please contact Marina for
some help.
Be wary of nannies who spend lots of time on the phone, don't be
sucked into their habits. Nanny calls should be kept brief -
to arrange visits or a quick exchange of information.
Longer 'downloading' chats should be kept for after hours, or visits
when children are occupied.
Nannies in complete isolation,whether by the parents choice,
circumstance or location now at least have lots of support through
many Internet sites based here and overseas.
If you are unable to make contact with other nannies through
playgroups or the children's activities - switch on the computer.
There are service in QLD, SA, VIC and NSW. You can find the
contact details on the TACON website under Nanny Directory.
www.tacon.com.au
There are message boards based here and overseas.
The MSN forums have The Nanny Village (managed by TACON)
and The Nanny Guild.
Other international message boards include Best Bear (UK);
nannyjob.co.uk ; AskNanny.com (US); Ilovemynanny.org (US) ;
NannyNetwork.com (US) - all which will give you access to a
large range of resources and different perspectives.
Keep in mind there are over 20,000 nannies working in NSW,
so there are a few around to make contact with.
Look after yourself, so you are in peak condition to look
after the kids in your care.
Comments